Search Results

  1. Atlas
    Are you kidding have you ever eaten those goddamn communion wafers they taste like chalk and muddy water and paper and dust and shit.
    Post by: Atlas, May 9, 2009 in forum: The Spam Zone
  2. Atlas
    And listen to the new White Rabbits album, "It's Frightening" because while frightening it's also some delicious music for your ears.
    Thread by: Atlas, May 9, 2009, 1 replies, in forum: The Spam Zone
  3. Atlas
    I just keep thinking about how funny it'd be if he grew up to be a construction worker and one day he was in a tragic accident involving a nail gun.
    Post by: Atlas, May 9, 2009 in forum: The Spam Zone
  4. Atlas
    Not hey-seuss.






    Jee-zus. No joke.
    Thread by: Atlas, May 9, 2009, 22 replies, in forum: The Spam Zone
  5. Atlas
    The_Last_Thing_I_Do.zip

    And that's all, i clear my downloads once a week.
    Post by: Atlas, May 9, 2009 in forum: The Spam Zone
  6. Atlas
    Listening now, liking it so far.
    Post by: Atlas, May 9, 2009 in forum: The Spam Zone
  7. Atlas
    New profiles are shit.


    Old school all the way.
    Post by: Atlas, May 9, 2009 in forum: The Spam Zone
  8. Atlas
  9. Atlas
    On the first day, He did nothing.
    On the second day, He stole some honey from the Bee.
    On the third day, he ate.
    On the fourth, he went to sleep.
    On the fifth through ninety seventh day, he slept.
    Somewhere around the hundredth day, He woke.
    The Wonderful Ursurus gave a great yawn
    He stretched
    He scratched, but could not reach that one place in the middle of his back, you know which one i'm talking about.
    He was bored
    Pulling some dirt the Earth, and scraping some Honey off of the bottom of the pot, he made them into the shape of a man.
    Certainly not in his own image, because that would be too perfect.
    When the man was done, Ursurus Sneezed.
    And what a Sneeze it was. Man awoke, and was horny. "Hey Dude," he called "Make me something i can fuck"
    Ursurus was a male as well, and understood the need.
    Grabbing air from the sky this time, as to make a fairer creature, he once again mixed it with honey, and woman was made.
    Man and woman fucked. Had shitloads of babies. The Earth was populated.
    Other creatures were made over time, whenever Ursurus became bored. Looking at the wonderful genetic diversity we have today, this appeared to be ALL THE TIME.
    Finally, one day, He decided He would make a creature in his own image.
    He created Four of these "Bears" and sent them unto Earth.
    While the Four had Ursurus image, they did not have his sense of caring, nor his appetite for Honey.
    They craved flesh, and being in the image of The Perfect One, had no trouble acquiring it.
    Ursurus saw what was happening, and at first he laughed. "This shit's better than the Tee Vee!" He cried. But suddenly He realized He sorta almost liked man, and was far too lazy to make him again.
    So he found a man, with a wife and 2 sons. He said "Hey. Find a tree. A big one. Climb it. Take some animals, i don't want to do this shit all over again"
    So they did. Their names are not important, for they are simply humans.
    And they were saved, for the moment.
    Ursurus regarded his Four Bears.
    They were...Too perfect.
    So he decided to split them into a multitude of smaller, less powerful bears. Black Bears, Grizzly Bears, Brown Bears, and Polar Bears, to name a few. Once they had been split, they were not as dangerous, and humans could live with them as long as they stayed away from the fuckin Bears.
    But Ursurus did not want the humans to get too lazy
    The Mighty Ursurus giveth, the Mighty Ursurus taketh away.
    While he had diminished them in power and size,
    Bears could now climb trees.
    Post by: Atlas, May 7, 2009 in forum: The Spam Zone
  10. Atlas
    So far it's just called Bears.


    Here's how i believe the universe started.


    In the beginning, there was nothing. And then, there was the Bee. The Bee simply did what he did best. He made the Honey. Honey, as we all know, attracts bears. AND THEN THE GREAT URSURUS CAME, AND HE ATE THE HONEY, AND IN THE MIGHTY BELCH THAT FOLLOWED, THE UNIVERSE WAS CREATED.

    A growl rippled from the divine throat of Ursurus, and there was light. And it was okay, i guess. Needed more honey. Another growl from the righteous vocal cords of the bear, and there was the Earth, which was also okay.
    Thread by: Atlas, May 7, 2009, 12 replies, in forum: The Spam Zone
  11. Atlas
    No the statement "Innocent until proven guilty" means "Innocent until proven guilty"

    Just because your family is full of whiney bitches doesn't mean you can switch up the english language.
    Post by: Atlas, May 7, 2009 in forum: The Spam Zone
  12. Atlas
    So i'll post this here.


    I'm unattractive, /khv/, and so i feel like shit most of the time. I used to be a cutter in eighth grade. Thinking about starting up again, because it worked.


    I don't care about your stories, or how you feel about this, or your sympathy, or whatever it is you feel the need to post.

    Just give me something else to do, something that isn't talking about it with the stupid fucking guidance counselors because we all know that's a waste of time. Something that works, that'll at least distract me from feeling like i wanna bash my head in til my brains leak out all over floor.
    Thread by: Atlas, May 7, 2009, 12 replies, in forum: The Spam Zone
  13. Atlas
    Post

    Title

    Only losers get high off cough syrup, cool kids smoke grass.
    Post by: Atlas, May 7, 2009 in forum: The Spam Zone
  14. Atlas
    Hammer made of glass, or hammer made for glass?

    Quite a bit of difference between the two.
    Post by: Atlas, May 6, 2009 in forum: The Spam Zone
  15. Atlas
  16. Atlas
  17. Atlas
  18. Atlas
    Way to go, "Karl". 9/10
    Profile Post by Atlas for Catch the Rain, May 6, 2009
  19. Atlas
    So if any of you remember sometime last night when i said that i hate every single one of you?

    This is why. Jesus christ, read. READ.
    Post by: Atlas, May 6, 2009 in forum: The Spam Zone
  20. Atlas