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It feels like it was only a couple days ago when @Sabby and I were catching up on Skype, talking about what we were doing now and where we wanted to go. After a couple jokes, and me choking on my water laughing, Sabby asked a question I’ve been mulling over ever since:

Back when I first joined staff in 2011, I always told myself “I’ll do this until I graduate Uni,” and have remained adamant on that stance ever since. Although I’ve never discussed it publicly before, my first two years of college were very trying. I was in an atmosphere on campus where I felt as though I was always tearing myself down, and with things not much better on the site around that time, it felt kinda hopeless at some spots.

As a result, I think I ended up throwing myself at KHV, trying to do more so I could feel proud that, at least in one place, I was on top of myself and the goals I set out to achieve. It continued like this through second year, and by the start of my third year, I found Uni to be better. I found groups of friends I really liked being around, I became more involved on campus, and I felt like I was finally where I wanted to be performance wise.

I’m sure y’all noticed, but my activity from that point (Fall 2014) to now has been very sporadic. As much as I tried to be around regularly, I always ended up finding something that made me happy, that made me want to reach out and experience more when I closed this screen.

Coming into this summer, I told myself that I would try and put in another two years before hanging up the blue, to make up for the times I wasn’t around. I told Sabby just as much when I answered her question. Sitting where I am now though, I don’t think I can commit to that idea anymore.

I’m going to start attending graduate school in the spring, and then eventually go for a doctorate in psychology in hopes of opening my own, affordable inner city private practice for populations of people that need it. I have friends back at my Uni, who graduate this year and next year, and want to spend as much time with them as I can. I’ve got family and friends I haven’t really gotten to see much in the last four years, and a lot to catch up on. I have jobs I want to get, places I want to go, people I want to meet -- so much of the world is open to me now, and sometimes, you just have to leave the past behind you.

I love KH-Vids. I loved it since I first joined that fateful August 21st, with the wide-eyed, yet inexperienced enthusiasm of someone new to the Internet. This site has watched me and stood by me as I grew up. You were there with me from being that slightly out of sorts 15 year old to now, the 22 year old, more confident, more self assured, admittedly less patient and ready to be petty, but that’s beside the point. :b

Being on staff the past five years has been an experience I couldn’t imagine not having. Even though the team has drastically changed through the years, I have the utmost respect for everyone I worked with back in summer of 2011 as a fresh Sectional Mod all the way to now as an Admin. All of you put passion, effort, and love into the things you did, and getting to know you all throughout the years has been a privilege. I know not all of you are on the site anymore, but thank you so much for everything you did for me and for this site. Y’all are like that weird family that I never dreamed I’d have, but ended up having, and I would never wish any of that away.

Looking over my years on the site, I’ve met so many great people, and admittedly, some people that I really don’t want to think about or see again after this thread. But you all have shaped me in some way or form. Whether we talked all night, whether we talk now or haven’t talked in years, all of that has left a mark on me.


I know that the last couple of days with staffing changes has been really dramatic and chaotic. To be quite honest, it’s been that way behind the scenes since the new change in ownership. Unfortunately, part of the reason for my departure, and why it was hastened, was because of this. I dunno if y’all have noticed but I really don’t like to be involved with or around drama at all. Least of all, I hate feeling like I have to tread on eggshells just to work. I hate having to worry about the positions of my team, and how that in turn will effect the members of the site.

I’m sorry that this conflict that’s been hidden away has become so out of control, and that I couldn’t do better to prevent this. I love you guys and this site, and I’m sorry that things had to end the way they are now. I would’ve preferred a happier time to do this, but sometimes, you gotta do what you gotta do. If you have any questions about anything that’s been happening, just let me know and I’ll answer.


I briefly considered not doing shout outs, but then I thought: “who cares! Tell the people in your life how much they matter!”


@Fearless : We started talking in...2010, I wanna say? I barely remember what we talked about then, but I’m pretty sure it was you who got me into watching this. In any case, I appreciate you as a friend so so so much, and I’m glad we’ve been able to talk again recently. You better bet your butt I will meet you at ToraCon next year and after that, and I hope that your job keeps going well! WE WILL PUSH EVERYONE OFF THOSE CLIFFS.

Sabby: This hooker. I remember when you thought I hated you and I thought you didn’t like me, and our first real conversation was maaad tense until we both realized that we’re both giant losers, haha. You’ve become family to me over the last five years and it means so much to me. I know we’ve been talking less the last two-ish years, but that doesn’t change anything. I love talking with you and Julia over Skype and being derps about whatever comes up. You can bet your aardvark butt that I’ll still be in your life. And maybe you can actually go to Disney the same time I do for once >:

@Juicy: I know you probably won’t see this, but I’m glad I got to know you Harriet. You’re so fun and bubbly, and I nearly flipped in excitement when you popped in a couple years ago. I miss you tons and hope that you’re doing great. <3

@muff monkey : Emmyyyyy. I’m glad we’ve gotten to know each other over the years. You’re so easy to talk to and fun to hang out with. I miss talking to you and having you guide me through League -- we should play again one day! I hope you’re well, and that you’re having a great time in college!

@Spunk and @Aura : I know I haven’t talked to either of you too much lately, but I’m so glad that you two are happy and doing really well. I’ll never forget talking with you both over MSN all night, smashing pinatas and making those funny doodles. I would totally want to meet you both sometime in the future, and then we can TAKE OVER CALIFORNIA/GEORGIA/NEW YORK. I wish you both nothing but the best Alli and Vi, both of you absolutely deserve it.

@Xaale and @Janime6 : Y’all were some of my first friends on KHV, and I’ll never forget that. I follow both of you on twitter/Tumblr, so it never feels like you’re far away. I hope you’re both doing well, and keep on doing great things! Jake, I appreciate your pantsu posts you b-baka. And Xaale, you’ve improved so much with your art and I know you’re gonna keep reaching greater heights.

@Jayn : I’m gonna send you a link to this and Twitter, and probably talk more there, but I’m sorry that things took a wild and weird turn with our friendship years ago. I want you to know that I’ve always appreciated and cared for you. I hope we can catch up one day and just talk about everything that’s happened, but I’ll just message you on Twitter for that. :b Also, join Team Mystic.

@Boy Wonder : Continuing the trend of me barely talking to friends, congrats on getting married! Thanks for being there for me way back when, and always feeling able to come to me with stuff for the site. I still remember that 18 hour long forum rearrange conversation we had back in the day, lol. I hope everything is going well and keeps on getting better! And I suppose now that you’re married, you’re no longer as Unsexy. I guess. :b

@Cookiie and @Dinny: I know neither of you go on KHV that much anymore, and I’ll probably just end up messaging you offsite about it, but I’m so proud of you two always and forever.

@Alex856 and @Clear_so_you_can't_See: You two aren’t on KHV anymore, but it would feel incredibly wrong to leave y’all off this list. You both were there for me in 2010, and we had so many (mis)adventures in MSN and throughout the forum. Both of you have me on Facebook, but I hope you’re doing really well in everything you want to pursue! One day I would definitely like to get together and talk again.

@InFam (I can’t tag you all so I’ll tag @Korosu as a stand-in lmao): I haven’t been very active in the chat that much the past year or two, but y’all mean a lot to me. I love just messing around with y’all when things got tough, and that chat has always brought a smile to my face whenever I see a butt ton of notifications or whenever we do calls. I’ll try to be more present in it now, even though ALL OF YOU SHOULD GO TO DISCORD ALREADY. 429tra <3

@Misty : Cassie, I love our casual antagonism. I’m really thankful for all your help, before staff, during staff, and after. I know we don’t talk much anymore, but I’m glad that you’re doing well, and I know you’ll be a great teacher someday. We still need to go to a concert together (mostly so I can tell ya boyf about the dancing video).


To the rest of you, sorry if I didn’t mention you by name! I know I’ve probably got a lot left to say, and you’ll likely be privy to it as y’all reply. If I had one thing I wanted to say to everyone, it’s thanks. The last seven years have been an unforgettable ride of ups and downs, of laughs and tears, of camaraderie and unfortunately, a few hurtful betrayals of friendship and trust that can probably never be smoothed out. But every single thing built me into where I am today, and I wouldn’t be the person I am now without KH-Vids.

A ridiculous number of you already have me on social media, but here’s my tumblr and my Twitter if you ever wanna get in touch. I want to say I’ll still be around, but in all likelihood, this is probably the end of the rope for me here on KH-Vids, outside a few, sporadic appearances. I’m likely going to retire my current Skype, though I may pop onto Discord a few times.


It’s been wild everyone, and I’ll remember you all.

I’m content.


Stay fresh,
Plums

Question Time with...

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