**** YOU ALL. I'm an Indians fan, and they are gonna BEAST the Red Sox tonight! I lived in Cleveland for most of my ilfe. HELL YEAH! *gets bricked*
Holy Crap. Super Holy Crap. I can not ****ing believe that it is even possible for a fanfiction to be that good. Soushirei, you are my hero just for writing this unbelievable peice of literature. Just, WOW! You explained everything, and left out no details. It is just amazing. AMAZING. *dies* Actually, I do have a question about it. I understand the whole Sora/Ven thing, as I've read through the posts and seen all of the questions regarding that topic that you have answered. However, the only thing that doesn't make sense to me is the timeline. How could Sora be Ven's reincarnation if he was already born when Ven "perished"? Seeing as Kairi is the same age as Sora, and Kairi was a small child at the time of Ven's death, how could this work out? Chapter 17 is 3 months in the making. Jesus Christ, I can't wait, OMG. Wow. You're so good.
That's what I was afraid people would say.. I'm completely and utterly undecided. I'm not sure If I should call it Writer's block or something else.
Alright everyone. I'm in a slight pickle. I have written 2 different versions of chapter 8, one involving an OC, and the other with an in-game character. I'm not sure which one to make official. You see, this chapter is pretty important, and this chapter will alter the story entirely. I'm not sure if adding in an OC will be a positive or negative influence on the story, becuase I'm not sure if my readers would like it. So, I'm giving YOU the choice! *squee* Should I include a character not normally involved in the KH universe, or should I include on that is? Just so you know, if you do pick the OC, than there might be some other explanation and reading about the new character that would be necessary to understand them. But this information is already written, so It's not like it would take me any longer to update or anything should you make this choice. So choose away! I'm eager to release Chapter 8. The first option to receive 5 people to prefer it will be the one I use.
This is great. I'm still laughing. ROFL about Luxord's top 10 ways to see Xigbar.
Where did you hear that? I've been pretty active on this site. Well, at least I visit it every day. Sometimes I just don't get around to being on as long becuase of school and stuff. That being said, I usually update on weekends........ Oh look, it's Friday ;) But thanks for bumping anyway.
Why can't introductions be longer? *pout* You did amazing. Continue!
Thank you! *smiles*
I'm still loving the FF references you make. And the Larxene fight was great. You made me hate her again just like I did when I first played COM. *patiently waits for updates*
If you mean that I don't think it is good enough to send to square-enix, that's not what I was implying at all. I was saying that nothing is good enough to send to square, becuase they're not a company that is accepting tons of fanfictions about their games. I didn't mean to be a bad person or anything, but sometimes when you don't even make an effort to spell check and hardly organize your story at all, some critique is necessary, harsh as it may be. However, it is your choice whether or not to take it. Even if I did think it "wasn't good 'enuth'" you shouldn't have a problem, becuase not everybody is going to like all of your stories. In writing a story, you have to understand that some people will not like it.
o_O Look through the other pages of the thread. That is only one chapter.
Great Job! I've got a question, actually. Is Kairi only going to fight all of the Organization members and then get back to Sora? Or will another obstacle come in her way before getting home?
Despite some inconsistencies that don't align up right with the game, it is really good. You could just explain things a tad bit more. Other than that, great. I can't wait to see what happens next.
.... You've got to be kidding. This story needs work. The idea itself could be a good one if executed correctly, but in this case, it is DEFINITELY not. First of all, include dialog, but make sure it is clear who is speaking. Take time to describe emotions and surroundings, and exactly what is going on to give the reader a picture. Describe the emotions on people's faces, describe their surroundings, anything. Make it something we can relate to and enjoy rather than struggle to read. You only said dialog and actions, and that does not make people want to read it. On the contrary, it makes them want to never look at it again. Second, you SERIOUSLY need to work on spelling, punctuation, and grammar. I could hardly tell at some points exactly what you're saying. It was very primitive in this aspect. Divide it into paragraphs. You should also make sure it is in chapters instead of a paragraph a post. Finally, even though I could completely blast and criticize you in many other ways, I have a feeling that my advice won't be taken, so I won't to save time. However, I advise you NOT to do that. Square-Enix does not concern themselves with fanfictions of their games at all. They do not care about even the best of all fanfictions, which, I am sorry to say, yours is not part of. What on earth possessed to to try and do this? Sending a grammar-less, non spell checked, emotionless story that doesn't tie into the story line of the game is a waste of paper and postage. Besides, what would you accomplish by sending it? It isn't like it could get published. IT IS A FANFICTION. Your writing style is in woeful need correction. Hopefully in a year or two by taking more Language Arts classes and such you may be able to improve it, or at least the grammar part. Some people just aren't cut out for writing facfictions. They have Ideas, but are unable to put them down on paper and express them to their readers in the same way. Maybe you are one of these people. If you want to continue, go ahead, but it might be wise to try a new hobby, such as drawing or video making. It is really okay; some people just can not write. Sorry if I sounded to harsh, but I'm trying to give you realistic critique. I figured if you were serious about sending a fanfiction to SE, you might need a slight push to bring yourself back to reality. Again I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings or anything like that.
It's really good!! You just have to make sure that you watch for spelling and punctuation errors. Maybe explain and describe a little more of what is going on rather than just dialog. And you could give more feedback on what is going on with the other characters; is this before or after KH2? What are Riku and Kairi doing? Are they friends with Nikki as well? Just some suggestions. You should update soon though, I'll be looking to see what happens.
I agree with your statement. However, as far as war being inevitable goes, I do not believe that is true. War is merely an instinct; violence settling problems does not get us anywhere. Surely it can be avoided. Perhaps if we actually set our goals into achieving peace rather than achieving money wars could be avoided altogether.
....Bush is an *** for plenty other of reasons. He's an idiot. A complete idiot. I have a countdown calender until he is out of office. In 2004, he made a speech stating that the World Trade Centers were attacked on September fourth, 2001... I've got plenty more arguments about this guy, but seeing as the entire thread is basically blasting him, I don't see them needed. >.<
I've cut a grape in half and put it in the microwave. ....... Nobody was permanently damaged.
The fact that it was supposedly written at 1 in the morning is not an excuse, as you could edit it before posting or even if you posted it right then you could edit it to fix the mistakes you made while you "Didn't even know what you were talking about." Anyway, as far as the whole Riku/Cloud thing, I've read so many fanfics concerning the organization with new characters that I'm practically trained to unscramble any name with an X with it and try to figure out what it originally was. Considering the fact that this is a Kingdom Hearts forum, I doubt you'd have fooled anyone for long. I take your word for it, however, that there are plot reasons that you are not revealing the many questions you brought up, and will wait for you to continue to make any further judgment.
ZOMG CtR!! You didn't subject us to it! We wanted to read it! All your poems are amazing. I could really relate to a lot of what you're saying. It's really great poetry. *clappies*
