It's official, I'm irresistible

I wake up to a text from some person I haven't talked to in a year saying basically this,

What. the. ****? This is a person that I haven't talked to in over a year, and I don't think I can stress that NOTHING HAPPENED between us enough. She was just this person that I talked to for a semester and slowly stopped talking to over time. I don't understand where this whole "victim" thing comes from because literally nothing happened. nothing.


I guess I just have that natural charm~
If my irresistibleness is causing anyone here pain I am truly sorry (no I'm not)

 

She wants the D. More to the point, she wants YOUR D.

 

Get the permits from the city and lay that pipe, son.

 

I was gonna leave an ugh, MEN response to all the replies thus far

Then Ghetto cracked me up

gg

 

She ****ed some guys
Then the guy left or some ****
Now she needs someone to string along until she can find another meat rod.
You just happened to be the one guy who she knew would be willing to be that guy on her contact list.