Sora's Journey (A Hilarious Poem)

Discussion in 'Archives' started by Roxas, Nov 29, 2006.

  1. Roxas OG

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    Sora’s Journey

    I have one friend, Riku’s has name
    We like to play a childish game
    You gently take off the other pants
    Then round my butt hole do a dance

    There’s also Kairi sleep and sound
    Violate her while she’s down
    If she wakes up run and hide
    Or catch her round the other side (tee-hee)

    Oh my god a big dark ball
    Out comes a shadow very tall
    I receive an overly large key
    But not as big as my pee-pee

    I fight for war and I fight for love
    Sucked into the air this is enough
    Licked by a dog when I awake
    Where am I for goodness sake?

    Traverse Town is this place
    So I give off a goofy face
    When I meet two friendly men
    One’s a dog and one’s a… hen?

    So we go into a ship of Gummi
    Yes, the name sounds very funny
    Please do not make fun of it
    Alright, the truth - it’s a piece of ****

    The very first stop is Wonderland
    A rabbit runs with a clock in hand
    Through a door that shrinks in size
    Saying he wasn’t a midget would only be lies

    I drink a potion and I’m very small
    I hope it wasn’t addicting at all
    Because you never know what they put in those drugs
    From a naked man I get lots of hugs

    A fat old woman at a podium(s)
    Her fingers are like little drums
    A super hawt girl is standing there
    Her head must be cut off, even the hair
    So am I still waiting?
    For this world to stop hating
    Can’t find a good reason
    Can’t find hope to believe in

    I totally ripped off Sum 41
    It doesn’t matter; it was a load of fun
    So I find the shadow and defeat it
    Even though my voice is really girly I have one hair in my armpit

    Back into the Gummi Ship we go
    It’s better than having a 20†afro
    Now we head into a jungle
    Donald dislikes Howard Jubungle

    Yes, I made up the word Jubungle
    Doesn’t even matter ‘cause this poem is rubbungle
    So let’s carry on with the story at hand
    Let’s skip a few worlds, move onto to Peter Pan

    So there is Riku with Kairi right there
    It looks like he has cut off her hair
    Looks like she has been in his pants
    Pants and stamps rhymes with ants

    My shadow comes to defeat me
    Luckily I have this massive key
    I’ve used it to save many worlds
    But it doesn’t get me any girls (boo-hoo)

    So I team up with Peter Pan
    His sword moves swiftly like a fan
    Captain Hook falls to our might
    He doesn’t put up a very good fight

    The crocodile eats his nice appendage
    In his teeth he mashed and bent it
    Riku managed to get away
    To Hollow Bastion we must save the day

    We meet a very hairy man
    Upon arrival in this brand new land
    He tells us that his name is Beast
    It’s a fitting name for such a… beast


    We fight our way into the castle
    It is too much of a big hassle
    Riku gets taken over by the darkness
    I don’t like him

    Then we fight to the end of time
    Not the end of the time, the end of mankind
    The name of the place is the End of the World
    I really want Pokemon Diamond and Pearl

    Then me and Ansem duke it out
    I like the way he screams and shouts
    I throw a punch at his left cheek
    Lots of EXP is what I seek

    So we come upon Kingdom Hearts
    Then Donald lets out lots of farts
    I’m glad I am done with this fight
    “Because without a doubt, Kingdom Hearts is light!â€

    Ansem explodes or something like that
    The doors to Kingdom Hearts are very fat
    We close them really nice and well
    Wherein Riku and Mickey forever dwell

    I finally see my friend Kairi
    She’s starting to float away from me
    The sand she stands on begins to slide
    I am too stupid to use glide

    So then she goes back to Destiny Islands
    All I had to do was glide to save her (insert word that rhymes with islands here)
    She goes into the secret spot
    I see her boobs and they’re really hot

    So I found myself at a crossroads
    Another mysterious man in a black robe
    Tells me to forget and remember
    I can’t even remember if it’s December >.<

    So I go to Castle Oblivion
    I cannot count to the number bazillion
    I climb the floors and lose my bits
    Bits include nice things like tits


    Eventually I fight a flower man
    Too caught up in giving hand
    To other guys like the dirty Axel
    … Uh, his name is… uh, um, Axel?

    Then I meet Namine
    She tells me to meet Haywood Jublomi
    I say no I don’t like wang
    She says she’s cool with that kinda thang

    So she puts me in a pod
    I should have brought my mini iPod
    No one likes the mini iPod
    Everyone wants the Video iPod

    Then I wake up one year later
    I guess my body is no traitor
    Me and my buds all shake hands
    There is a werewolf in my pants

    King Mickey saves us from some white guys
    They stole my favorite jewel red handbag
    They were true wiggas in the grillzin house
    Kairi will one day be my spouse

    So I go to a mysterious tower
    There I gain a brand new power
    The fairies call it Valor Form
    I’ll just call it Shmexy Form!

    The first stop is Hollow Bastion
    A bit boring if you were gonna ask that question
    My journey begins once again
    I must take down the Organization

    Now we enter the Land of Dragons
    Watch out for exploding wagons
    We have gone into Beast’s Castle
    Stick a candle up his *** hole

    Olympus Coliseum greets us next
    Hades breathing down our next
    We fight some battles and get out of there
    Phil really needs to grow some hair


    Then we meet the pirate Jack
    I think he’s really smoking crack
    Next is a place full of music
    No one likes it so we all misuse it

    After that I come upon a nice place
    Agrabah is getting’ up in yo face
    Halloween Town is really nice
    It’s full of cinnamon and sugar and spice

    Next is a place with a large rock
    No, it isn’t shaped like a sock
    The name of this place is the Pride Lands
    It gets better after my greatly laid plans

    Back to Hollow Bastion I go
    Teleported into a digital world
    Riding motorcycles and fighting them too
    This place is pretty stupid and Tron is poo

    So then I fight 1000 Heartless
    The battle was honestly completely pointless
    Tetsuya Nomura evidently wanted filler
    All he gave was an excitement killer

    So then I have to do all the worlds again
    What the ****’s with that it just isn’t grillzin
    Unfortunately there is nothing I can do
    But fight the Org members and visit Winnie the Pooh

    Finally my journey takes me to an exciting place
    And there I meet a familiar face
    He calls himself Roxas but he’s too much like me
    He wears a big hood so he cannot see

    We battle with all these overly large keys
    Unfortunately he has two and defeats me
    But in the end I take the victory
    Only because I choked him with silly putty

    Anyway, I meet up with the majestic King
    We wander around and find a big castle thing
    There, the greatest enemies lie
    I better do some side quests or else I will die


    So I enter the castle and fight many men
    With a big old dog and a useless hen
    First goes down one, then two, then three
    All that’s left is Xemnas and me

    But I seen find out that there is more to this
    I meet up with Riku and give him a kiss
    A meet up with Kairi and give her a hug
    She don’t deserve a kiss ‘cause she looks like a thug

    Finally the final boss battle comes
    This poem’s six pages and I’m not even done
    Me and Riku fight and we have lots of fun
    Xemnas is a weakling, he should use a gun

    So we kick his little *** and move on with our day
    The world of darkness is just a step away
    It’s like Destiny Islands but flooded with dark
    To return to our home, from here we embark

    The door to light opens, it’s finally true
    Which is good because the whole first game that annoying stupid voice had been telling me what to do, and I never knew what it meant and it was getting really annoying trying to figure out who it was, but it was now no longer telling me what to do
    So me and Riku entered the door
    We had no trouble to worry about anymore

    Kairi is waiting on the wave crested shore
    I begin to love her more and more
    I run up to her and bring out her charm
    I’m here for her, and I grab her arm

    But this journey’s not over - don’t stop reading yet
    For Kairi comes with a message unread
    She brings a message with a familiar seal
    We’re being brought into a whole new ordeal…

    To be continued
     
  2. Mish smiley day!

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    LOL. You wrote that? xD

    'twas pretty hilarious. I like how you rhymed 'beast' with 'beast' and 'axel' with 'axel'. :cool:

    Scandalous.
     
  3. Rena88 Twilight Town Denizen

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    i loved the part where you rambled on about the voice from kh1. it is hilarious :D
     
  4. Misty gimme kiss

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    That was beatiful.

    Me likes the whole "Still Waiting" part.

    That shows not all Poetry has to be about dieing. xD
     
  5. no-reality_allowed ¢ℓαιяνσуαηт ℓσνєкιℓℓ

    162
    lol, that was great xDDDD

    these are my fav. parts>>>

    So I found myself at a crossroads
    Another mysterious man in a black robe
    Tells me to forget and remember
    I can’t even remember if it’s December >.<

    So she puts me in a pod
    I should have brought my mini iPod
    No one likes the mini iPod
    Everyone wants the Video iPod

    Then we meet the pirate Jack
    I think he’s really smoking crack
    Next is a place full of music
    No one likes it so we all misuse it

    So then I fight 1000 Heartless
    The battle was honestly completely pointless
    Tetsuya Nomura evidently wanted filler
    All he gave was an excitement killer

    So then I have to do all the worlds again
    What the ****’s with that it just isn’t grillzin
    Unfortunately there is nothing I can do
    But fight the Org members and visit Winnie the Pooh

    Anyway, I meet up with the majestic King
    We wander around and find a big castle thing
    There, the greatest enemies lie
    I better do some side quests or else I will die
     
  6. Roxas OG

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    Male
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    Cin's basement
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    lol Thank you everyone. I hope more people come and read this beauitful poem.
     
  7. DJSeph Traverse Town Homebody

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    I'm to lazy to read this... but i saw the one's no-reality_allowed wrote so GJ!
     
  8. Roxas OG

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    Um, thanks?

    I don't know if that's good or bad - you didn't read it but you liked it.
     
  9. Jiηx You're such a loser.

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    Dude, that was amazing! I can't believe you wrote that, it deserves an award.....Here *Hands Roxas my left shoe* This is your award.
     
  10. Antidote Façade

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    Nov 26, 2006
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    THEY STOLE MY FAVORITE JEWEL RED HANDBAG!! XD Loved it. Also: His name was Beast, a fitting name for such a..Beast :cool: *wets self* *wets self* *peeage* >.>
     
  11. Roxas OG

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    Yes, I made up the word Jubungle
    Doesn’t even matter ‘cause this poem is rubbungle

    So let’s carry on with the story at hand
    Let’s skip a few worlds, move onto to Peter Pan

    We fight our way into the castle
    It is too much of a big h***le

    Riku gets taken over by the darkness
    I don’t like him

    My two favortie verses fromt he first half. I love the last line of the second verse "I don't like him."
     
  12. kairi destny Merlin's Housekeeper

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    lol,that was veerryy funny!:D
     
  13. A Shining Armour Merlin's Housekeeper

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    LMAO... wow... loved it... but you have way too much time on your hands to rhyme all that. Well mostly rhyme. :P

    My favourite stanza:

    Look out Shakespear... ;)
     
  14. khmage1918 King's Apprentice

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    this is **** awsome!!!

    how did you come up with that? tell me please! it was the best peom i have ever read in my life(and the longest but who gives a **** about that) please be my buddy!:o