Fast Food Madness: The Epic Return

Something tells me things aren't quite that simple, Sora thought, looking back at the ground. Roxas, I didn't know you when you were in the Organization. I knew nothing about what you did, but you probably weren't as comfortable there as you think. Maybe, just maybe, you were more lost then than you are now. Sora wanted to say the words aloud, but his mouth stayed shut, the brunet to caught off guard to speak.

 

"How could you know that? You didn't even remember any of that until now," Riku replied, his voice cool but at the same time sharp with edge.

Roxas tightened his fists, still leaning on them. "You have no idea what you're talking about. In case you haven't noticed, I've been dealing with this ever since we even found you in Agrabah," he fired back, anger showing clearly through his voice now. "Everything I had forgotten, it's clear to me now. With that comes realization, and that means I've seen the truth."

 

But not the whole truth, Sora thought, furrowing his brows. Roxas saw some truths about his past life, but he was forgetting about a large gap of his life--the time in New York. He spoke as if none of it mattered at all. Though Sora knew Roxas didn't mean things like that, it still hurt.

 

Riku arched an eyebrow. "The truth? And what would that be, Roxas?" This kid acted like he knew everything, when he was still just naive.

Roxas paused for a moment, simply glaring at Riku. What was the truth? He thought it was pretty obvious. "I already told you--everything I've gone through, the person who I've been lately. It's all fake, because after seeing those memories, I know that's not who I really am. There's a reason I was in the darker part of a world, dealing with the darkness every day and following orders that don't deserve to just be forgotten," he explained strictly. "This journey... This step back into the darkness of the worlds... It's awakened my true memories, and my real life before Twilight Town, before I even knew Sora existed." Roxas shook his head. "Nothing can change the way I used to be, and that part of me is still there. It's never left."

 

'True memories?' Is that what Roxas considers them to be? What about our lives as best friends?! Sora didn't see how Roxas could continue overlooking something so important in their lives. It pained him to know that perhaps Roxas really did see everything that happened in the last year as a waste. They had laughed together, fought together...trusted each other...Was he saying that was all for nothing? All because of his new revelations?

 

Roxas saw that Riku simply stared at him incredulously, obviously wanting to know how his old self had never left him. "Look at me!" he yelled. "Do you see how angry and--and dark this person is?! This is me! It has been all along! The loss of my memories with Organization XIII was just a mask, a cover-up for reality. Everything that's happened lately--it may be real too, and I don't regret any of it, but I can't help but feel as if I haven't been me, the person who was lost when the memories were buried."

 

Sora stopped listening when he heard Roxas bring up the Organization again. Your life doesn't revolve around that! he wanted to scream. He needed Roxas to know that who he was and what he did in the past didn't define him, but who he was now. His life the past year hadn't been a lie! He was genuinely happy! But now it was the complete opposite; he doubt Roxas could be any more miserable.

 

"And I don't even know how I forgot about it!" Roxas yelled angrily, frustrated beyond belief at the confusion this all brought. "I was obviously destined to, but now I've remembered everything. That has to mean something, even if it doesn't seem like it to you." He glared at Riku, aware that the silver-haired teen was being harsh toward him when he was in a time of struggle. Hmph. Like that's fair.

 

Sora stared at the ground, aware that Roxas was angry but the brunet was losing track of why. He hadn't heard Riku speak in a while, and that surprised him. Earlier, Riku had pretty much taken control of the conversation, but now he was silent. Why was that?

 

Roxas continued to glare at Riku, glancing at Sora after a minute. Then his eyes fell to the ground beneath him, the boy leaning back to sit on his knees. "I'm not saying that I like the guy I saw in my past," he admitted in a softer tone, though the anger was still there. "But it's who I was back then, and now that I've remembered... That has to mean that he's never disappeared, even if the memory was lost."

 

That doesn't mean that you are him now, Sora thought, glancing at Roxas. He saw his friend's frustration, and he understood where he would have trouble drawing the line, but he needed to realize that his revelations didn't have to rock his life like it was doing. It was in the past...couldn't it just stay there?

 

"...It's pretty obvious, I would think," Roxas continued, frowning at the ground. "The last thing I remember about the Organization was leaving it...because I didn't know who I was or why I was chosen to wield the Keyblade." He flexed his jaw. "I know why I wield the Keyblade now, and I know that the cycle is repeating itself. I was lost then just as I am now. I was bitter and cold when I was in the Organization and that's beginning to return too. It's only a matter of time before I completely become that person again..."

 

Sora couldn't just sit by anymore, Roxas' words making him physically ill. "That's not true!" he suddenly shouted, surprising himself. Who says you have to be that person? Who says you can't put it behind you and move forward? It's a choice to let it control you! And Roxas is letting it happen!!

 

Roxas jumped slightly at Sora's outburst, the loudness of his cry catching him off guard. But he gained his composure and furrowed his eyebrows, staring at his friend. "Yes it is, Sora!" he cried. "Don't you get it? I was against you before I even met you! I'm the opposite of you--your darkness! That's who I've always been!"

 

Sora turned to look at Roxas, eyebrows furrowed. "I refuse to believe that," he said evenly. "You've never been my darkness! You were taken advantage of by some dark people, but that doesn't mean that you're just like them!" He came close to shouting the words, partially because he had been quiet for so long. The other reason was that he wanted Roxas to know the truth--that he wasn't somebody made up of darkness, but a part of him. A good part. Not evil.

 

"'Someone from the dark'," Roxas recited, anger and frustration in his tone. "Don't you remember?" He was thinking about the time they fought in The World That Never Was, their first confrontation after Sora awakened. That was proof enough of who he was, where he had come from, and who he had been then.

 

"'From the dark,'" Sora said, emphasizing the first word. "Not actually a part of it!" Roxas may not have known who he was, but Sora knew that he couldn't possibly be dark and evil like he thought. The brunet knew his best friend much better than that.

 

"What's the difference?!" Roxas hollered, growing even more frustrated. "You should have realized who exactly you were fighting then, Sora. That was the person I'm talking about! My past self. That's who I was, and who I still am! You got a taste of it firsthand, and yet you're still acting like it doesn't exist! It does, inside me! Don't you see it?!"

 

"No, I don't see it!" Sora hollered back, hands clenched in fists. "I don't see it because that's not who you are! I don't care about who you were before. You're my best friend because of who you are today. Why can't you see that you don't have to keep turning back to that dark life to try and discover yourself?!" Looking back at the past never did anyone good unless you learned from the lessons it was teaching you. Roxas, though, was taking it the opposite direction, going back down a dangerous path he had been on with the Organization.

 

"Because half of my life was spent during that!" Roxas roared back, sharp blue eyes glaring at the identical pair opposite him. "Too much happened then, Sora! I can't just forget it and act like it never happened! That's like asking you to forget everything about Destiny Islands, where you came from!" He gritted his teeth together for a moment, staring at his friend. "Don't you think I want to know what I was like before I joined with you? I can't just drop the memories, Sora! Not when they're this important!"