Fast Food Madness: The Epic Return

Above the ringing in her ears, Namine heard a soft voice. A voice that was full of heartbreak and sadness and disappointment. Though the emotions were ones she hadn't heard much from the voice lately, she knew who was speak. Roxas.

 

Roxas lifted his arm that was across Namine's stomach and ran it over his eyes, sniffling once. "That stupid mission," he said, his voice trembling from his overwhelming emotions. "And the stupid Heartless and stupid Nobodies..." By the time his voice faded, he noticed more tears had left his blue eyes and were spilling down his face.

 

Namine heard Roxas' words, though their meaning was unclear to her. Mission? Nobodies? Weren't they just supposed to be fighting Heartless? She didn't bother saying the question aloud; she couldn't yet. She was just starting to wake up, just starting to get a grip on reality. Besides that, she doubt she would say anything. Right now, maybe Roxas just needed to speak and say whatever it was he had to say.

 

Roxas sniffled again, wiping his eyes with his arm again. "I shouldn't have left. Nothing would be the way it is now," he said, voice thick with emotion. "Nothing would have changed...between us, or with me." The recollection of his memories had changed everything, about himself and about his and Namine's relationship. And not just his recollection, but Sora's as well.

 

Namine heard the heartbreak in Roxas' words and she couldn't hold any anger against him. She wasn't the only one that had suffered during the past two months; he had too. The thought saddened her, and she subconsciously allowed the side of her head to rest against his chest, her eyes remaining shut as she tried to completely come out of the daze she was in.

 

Roxas looked down at Namine's still face, the boy shaking his head. "I'm sorry I'm not the same person you fell in love with," he confessed, the tears falling more at the truth behind his words. "I'm sure you've realized how different I am since the last time you saw me, and I know you don't like it." He turned his head forward and looked down at the floor. "That was obvious earlier..." Roxas hadn't been paying much attention to anything other than how angry he was about the news he received. There was something else he realized about the new Roxas--he was selfish.

 

Namine tried to think of words to say. Something that would comfort Roxas and let him know that she liked who he was now and she loved him even more than before. But that would be a lie; he had changed, and not in a good way. Though she didn't love the changes she saw in him, she still loved him. That was something that would never change. She knew who he was deep inside, and as long as that person existed, she would keep loving him.

 

Roxas took in a breath, his voice clear though his tears trickled slowly over his cheeks. "Some...things happened recently that I couldn't control, and they reminded me of how I used to be. It's how I am now, and that's something I'm going to have to live with for a long time." His arm tightened around Namine's waist at the thought he spoke next. "There's no way for me to go back, and I'm sorry. It's getting worse, and it's only going to continue getting that way until there's nothing left of me for you to hold on to," Roxas said, his vision blurring again at the realization. The tears that had already fallen dripped from his chin, certainly falling on Namine.

 

Namine furrowed her brows faintly, Roxas' last sentence impacting her heart enough that she now felt she had the strength to speak. "I'll always hold onto you," she murmured. She had more to say than that, but first, she wanted to open her eyes. The bond took in a soft breath, summoning the strength to open her eyes and look up at the person holding her.

 

Roxas's eyes found Namine in surprise, her voice having caught him off guard. As he stared down at her, he blinked, remembering that he still had tears running down his face. He turned his head away slightly, sniffling and wiping the sleeve of his jacket across his face to try to get rid of any traces that he had been crying.

 

Namine exhaled a breath and opened her soft blue eyes, her gaze immediately landing on the boy holding her. Her eyes remained gentle as she looked at him, aware that he was wiping at tears. She lifted her hand (her clean hand) and lightly touched Roxas' chin, turning his face toward her as she spoke. "Even when you lose your way," she promised him softly. "I won't give up on you."

 

Roxas blinked, though his eyes were still watery. "How can you say that?" he asked in disbelief. His voice was still wavering and he bit down on his lower lip to try and collect himself, though he wasn't sure it was going to be that easy.

 

Namine lowered her hand to set it on Roxas' arm across her waist, her blue eyes staying on him. "Because I know what it's like to lose your way," she responded softly. "I know what it's like to have to depend on somebody else to hold onto you even when you want to let go. I know how you start thinking it's easier to let go than it is to fight." She whispered the last sentence, those last words reminding her of something Roxas had said to her a long time ago. After Smith had taken her for a second time, she had lost her faith in their love. But Roxas promised he would fight for her. And that he had, because he helped her see the light again.

 

"But I can't fight this," Roxas replied, shaking his head. "A person can't fight the truth...even a Nobody like me." His eyes flickered away for an instant at the sentence, the boy trying to get his tears to go away. But he couldn't get them to; they only came back every time he spoke, mostly because his words were true.

 

Though Roxas looked away, Namine kept her gaze on him, letting her know by her soft gaze that she wasn't judging, only trying to help. "The truth?" Namine repeated in question form, not understanding what Roxas meant by that.

 

Roxas shook his head slightly, but he didn't look at Namine; his gaze only fell to the floor in front of him. "It's a lot to explain," he said quietly. The truth was that this person was who he was originally, the one he was born into. He was the opposite of Sora, the darkness while Sora was the light. That was how it was supposed to be, which was why he got his memories back--to remind him of who he truly was as a Nobody.

 

Namine shut her eyes and kept the side of her head against Roxas' chest, only allowing herself to be in that position because she was getting dizzy from forcing herself conscious so quickly. "I have a lot of free time," she started softly. "If there's ever a time you want to share, I'm available." She wouldn't pressure him into speaking about something he didn't want to talk about, but she would definitely let him know that she was there if he needed somebody to listen.

 

Roxas smiled sadly, turning his head to look down at the girl with teary eyes. "I know," he acknowledged softly. She was one of the reasons he felt everything before had been a lie. How could somebody like him be blessed with someone so kind and caring? It wasn't possible, but here she was, in his arms.

 

Namine felt Roxas' gaze on her, so she forced herself to open her eyes. When she saw the sad smile on his lips and the tears in his eyes, she smiled herself, the smile matching his in sadness. They had both fallen pretty hard because of what happened to them in the past two months. But as long as they fought for each other, things would be alright. They had to be.

 

Roxas held Namine's gaze for a moment, his smile staying on his face. After a few seconds, though, he lowered his head and brought Namine closer to him, leaning his cheek against her head as he hugged her to his body. He couldn't find words to say, and all he wanted right now was to hold her. After Jeff, after the last two months of being left alone, after what happened to Ty... After all the pain he caused her to endure.