KHV Confessions

It has finally been suggested - should this thread be closed?

I myself included, there are a few members who have grown wary of this thread and weary from it. Personally, I hate this thread, for reasons said before, but I feel like . . . everyone needs to get their problems out, because if we of KHV aren't going to listen to them . . . then who will?

Regardless, I'm debating getting a mod to close the thread. If you have any objections, you should PM me instead of voicing your opinions here.​

 

Random confessions are random;

I'm playing Neopets. My Sim went bankrupt and had to live in a park. I think cats are evil. >.>;;

Do I get shot for ruining the moment? ;;;

:x I'll stop now.

 

<3 Cat, you are like my best friend on this site and even if you are clingy I don't care- I love you for who you are and your sig rotator <333

;-;Aww, thank you guys, you're going to make me cry.

Also @Bushy, *hugs* that is all I can say, you mean a lot to me as well even if we don't talk loads <3

Don't worry Claw, I am exactly the same. It's hard but I think you do a great job and I far from hate you, I think you are incredibly talented and such a great friend <3

You are definitely not a terrible staff member, in all honesty I get jealous of both you and Claw because you seem so involved and know what to say.

Also, I always smile when you VM me because they always amuse me :D I don't care what you say to me, I just enjoy talking to you.



To everyone in this thread, I love you all <3 You are a beautiful community.

 

I really don't get why this should be locked. At all. What's wrong with this thread? Is it fear of people not being able to controll themselves and posting something they shouldn't? Most people on KHV are intelligent not to post something they'd regred, I reckon. But oh well, this site will be this site~

Tiem for some confessions:

I have never understood the fear for clowns. They always seemed like the nicest people ever! I mean, they've got a smile painted on their face, how can they be bad? Or maybe I've just had positive experiences with clowns, unlike a lot of other people.

I don't really see the point of talking to people most of the time. Not that I am anti-social, I just don't really see the point of it. Unless it's someone who I am already close to, then talking is something I love.

This one kinda relates to the last one, I am constantly afraid of losing the people I love. There's only a few people that I've truly opened up to, very few people, and I am always feeling like one of them will dissapear at any moment now. It's been like that for about a year now, after some events with a certain friend of mine.

I despise multi-cultiralism. So much so that whenever I read about places like London, what those places are on the way of becoming- I actually do get really light headed. I also feel extremely guilty about this.

Could post a lot more, but I have a fair amount of trouble with talking about personal things in public (Guess this counts as a confession as well?).

 

I'm the same way, but I don't see it as villainy. All three of those characters are characters that are easy to sympathize with, not hard-core super villains. Light was working for the greater good, but came out more corrupted than he should, Sweeney Todd's life was tragic, and Andrew was abused by his father. I perfectly understood every action Andrew took.

-At 20 years old, I saw Toy Story 3 with my girlfriend. At the end, when Andy was playing with the little girl, my eyes teared up. I have overactive tear ducts so it looks like I'm crying most of the time, but I'm really not. I decided to trick my girlfriend and pretend I was actually crying. It wasn't until I realized that the tears were just pouring out heavily that I realized I really was crying and at that point, I just started bawling.

-A lot of people say my girlfriend and I show too much PDA, but in reality, we really hold back. I love her so much that I can't imagine life without her<3 I consider our relationship much better than most people's our age. I see my friends fight with their others and walk off or get drunk or do something stupid or say something hurtful. Whenever we fight, I get more sad than mad and I don't want her to leave my side until we've resolved it.

-I used to sleep with a stuffed Miltank and a gold teddy bear named Popcorn (his real name was Sir Buttersworth III). I was in high school when I gave them to my little sister and I hated her for the way she treated them.

-I think my 11 year old sister is going to grow up to be a whore. Actually, I'm sure of it.

-The thought of losing my slightly alcoholic, bipolar, severely depressed, and extremely paranoid mother that has had suicidal tendencies in the past scares me to death. When they moved her to New York to get a better doctor, I was so scared that I was never going to see her again. I can honestly say that nothing has scared me so much. I don't give a damn about my father, but my mom...

-For a few years, I feared that I had inherited some of my mother's mental problems, along with developed one of my own. I was detached from the world and had little emotion. Whenever I did have emotion, I just couldn't show it. What scared me more was that I thought about it and feared about it. I avoided seeing a psychiatrist about it, but I knew there was something wrong with me. After a couple of months with my girlfriend, I stopped worrying about it. I've had no problem showing emotion because of her. Though I still think there's some things wrong with my mind, it doesn't bother me anymore because she's the best damn medicine I could ever have. She taught me that I'm not crazy.

-My mind works on different levels at the same time. I can have so many different trains of thoughts going on at once, but I can only focus on one. This means that usually I have thoughts that I'm not actually thinking in the background of my actual thoughts. While it's great for multitasking, it's so...annoying to have this incessant buzzing almost constantly in my head. It's one of the reasons I enjoy smoking weed. It quiets the other levels of thoughts for some time while allowing me to enjoy myself and then return to normal later (as opposed to me constantly taking some medication that changes my behavior or has negative consequences).

-As most people from my generation, I always fantasize about gaining superpowers or something. As most comic book geeks, I usually put myself in the shoes of one of my favorite heroes. But I'm afraid I can't cut it. I don't have the willpower to be a Green Lantern, I'm not physically able to be trained by Batman (nor do I have the tragic background), I don't know if I'm moral enough, I'm arachnophobic. Let's face it, I don't deserve superpowers.

 

Gonna start out by saying; if you feel obligated to post here, this thread isn't for you at all. Confessions, by definition, have to be willing. If you feel depressed, or that you're being pressured into posting here, just don't look at the thread.

Now some things to say:

- I suffer from a very mild form of autism that makes it difficult sometimes to communicate with people in a way that's entirely understandable. My mind is written in a different way to most others. There's only one person that I know is able to understand me almost all of the time.
- I've suffered from depression for about four years. It was triggered by my first true romantic relationship falling apart slightly dramatically. Thankfully it took all of a month before I met Bushy Brow, and from there I've been stable. Still depressed, but it's kept in check.
- I have all of three friends that live close-by, and they've been with me since secondary school. I don't consider there to be a difference between online and offline friends; they're still my friends, and I care for them just as much no matter whether we've met face-to-face or not.
- I was supposed to be one of a pair of twins, but the other fell victim to Vanishing Twin Syndrome. I've always blamed my mother for it.
- I am a firm believer in spirits and the afterlife, despite having no fixed religious beliefs.
- One of my pet hates is when people say "of" instead of "have". You have no idea how irritating I find it.
- Possibly the cause of the above; I used to be considered dyslexic, but I hated the position it put me in. I began to write constantly, and it took over a huge part of my life. I'm not considered dyslexic anymore, because I worked so hard at it that it simply wasn't a problem anymore. I hadn't even finished primary school at the time.
- I love every single person on this forum, and would feel sad if any one of you left for whatever reason. You might think I'm exagerating, but I'm not.

Blarg, I hate writing about myself, but it feels good to get it all out there.

 

Okay.... I have a bunch of confessions.... x.x'


Warning, If you are prone to depression from stories I don't recommend reading this... even Chipster the Cat got pretty emotional~ also, it's long so it's okay to be all like tl;dr although this was a really good vent ^^ and thanks to you who actually take your time and read it. :3


- For one, I am a very loving person but I always get stepped on and used by everyone that I know. I'm very cautious of people and don't exactly open myself up to anyone easily... but when I do quickly after a year or two maybe even more like some of my old supposed "best friends" have stabbed me in the back. Such as, one of my friends that with my ex boyfriend gung up on my by coming to my house and told my dad that I was going out with my current boyfriend. She and him both came to my house in his car laughing and stuff and she claims she was there for "support" for both of us thankfully my other friend that was at her house gave me the information that she went with him because he was buying her a pack of cigarettes.

- Another thing with my ex, I was practically raped many times because I just couldn't say no no matter how much it would hurt. I was a good little girl that wanted to wait until marriage. He ruined my mind and my body and he claims it was all mutual feelings.

-I cheated on my ex with my current boyfriend about a year ago. I felt really bad about it but he was so bad and I couldn't handle the mental stress that man put me through. My current boyfriend came into my life and I intend to keep for the rest of it. Because of him I was able to gain the strength of leaving my ex and getting useless people out of my life.

-I was picked on in middle school to **** all because I liked anime. I was kicked thrown onto the ground punched and bullied. My grandpa had passed around that time aswell and they would tell me that they were happy that my grandfather passed.

-I had a dog named spot I had him for 15 almost 16 years of my life he died 2 weeks before my birthday. He was my only friend. He was all I really had. I cried for literally 2 weeks non-stop... I couldn't sleep I couldn't do anything. I couldn't believe that he was out of my life. I couldn't even manage to drag myself to his grave. I couldn't accept the fact. My ex argued with me telling me to stop crying that "it" was "just a dog"

-I have terrible self-esteem because of being picked on and the fact that I was called a "guy" since I was in middle school. my boyfriend and a bunch of others claim i'm cute but honestly I don't believe them one bit. I don't think i'm very attractive at all...

-My grandpa had cancer and that was the cause of his death. I was in 6th grade. I had the chance to see him in intensive care because they were going to pull the plug the next day but I was clueless. I ended up waking up the next day at exactly 11:11 to the sound of crying and yelling in sorrow. My mother woke me up saying that my grandpa had passed and that we were going to go see his body at the place since he didn't want a viewing or a funeral. He wanted to be incinerated and thrown into the ocean. The worst part about his death was seeing my grandmother. She kept saying how cold he was freezing. The oncoming year was possibly the worst year of my life. I moved into my grandmothers house and couldn't help but hope he would somehow be there the next day when I woke up but that day never came. It's the worst feeling that you can ever have in your life. It was the same with my dog aswell especially since every day after I came home from school my dog would be either running around waiting me to open the gate or would be sitting on the steps waiting for me with his front legs crossed and when I walked up to him he would quickly stand up and wag his tail and get insanely happy. I kept waiting; I still am.

-As a kid I had a hole in my heart (literally) I had a heart murmur and got the operation in 1st grade going onto 2nd grade. My neighbors had a dog named Misty. They had gotten rid of her but I BEGGED my parents to take her back I wanted her so badly. She was the nicest dog ever when you would tell her "da me una sonrisa" which means "give me a smile" in spanish and she would show her teeth and wag her tail insanely. In 8th grade, she grew a tumor in her mouth and wasn't able to eat. The inside of her mouth was falling out in chunks it was horrible. We had to put her down. In a mere 2 weeks she was gone. Well, not even 2 weeks, a week and a half is more like it.

-I was a problem child aswell x.x' in second grade the tiny kid that I am/was picked up a desk and threw it at my teacher and on the way to the principals office I bit the security guard that came to pick me up on the way there while kicking and screaming lol.

-I used to get hit as a kid for the simplest things such as not eating my food or not finishing my homework or studying.

- My mother kicked me out of the house exactly one year ago aswell as said that I was a terrible child and that i'm useless. Just this last friday, I went to her house to make a cosplay trying to be a good kid and hang out with my mother that claims she loves and misses me, I wanted to introduce her to my new boyfriend so I did. All she did while we were there was insult me and be rude to me. I had gone outside to see my dogs puppys and I am apparently allergc to them and I broke out in small hives so I asked for rubbing alcohol to ease the allergy and all she did was get it and say "You know this WAS your house for most of your life you SHOULD remember where it is." I had only asked her because for one, She had mixed up the house from how it used to be but I stayed quiet to not start an argument. (there's a lot more about my mom but i'm not going to talk about her it heats me up way too much)

Warning I'm a bit insane down there ._.'
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-I was in a depressive state from 6th grade until literally 4 months ago and actually used to contemplate on how I would kill myself in detail and when and infront of who I wanted to do it infront of. It differed from slit wrist to throat to a stab to the chest to re-open the hole that I thought was never meant to close.

 

This thread need not close.

Its not forced, it is a free confession. You don't want it posted then don't post it.
Don't worry about what people think, if they care then they don't matter, if if they don't care then they matter. Dr Seuss you magnificent *******!

Confessions:

- Years ago on the forum, I constantly lied to a number of members about who I was. I wanted to seem important, get some attention when in real life I wasn't getting any from anyone. I have not apologised or told the members themselves (most have left anyway) but I do regret what I did.

 

Confession: I always thought that you and Jaku...? Ja... Je... Jiku! Yeah, that's it, Jiku. I always thought you two would make for a mean couple. It's a shipist's dream.

For the record, this is more of a jest if anything. No one can tell when I am jesting it seems, I must spoil it. Spoiled, soiled, my funniness foiled. dammit. Half jesting, anyways, perhaps there is a grain of truth to it after all... I can see it.

 

You aren't someone I can easily imagined making a joke. To really sell a joke you have to be willing to make yourself seem foolish, verbose or at flaw in some way. People then know you're not being serious about it, and as such is a joke. However the tricky thing is showing people when you're serious when you're the constant joker person. God it kills when everyone thinks I'm being sarcastic...

Her and me? I wish... I mean, wat?
Jiku Neon, formerly, Trogder, orignally, 'unknown'. She went through a number of accounts, i think they got hacked or lost passwords or something. I would happily date her or someone like her. To be honest, I would've been happy to date her in the days when I thought 'she' was a 'he'.
I remember when we said we'd forever be regular members, and never want to be prem.
Well, I'm a Prem of 2 or so years and she became staff at one point. We're both bad liars. We have so much in common.

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Those are technically unintentional confessions. So I'm on topic.

 

Spoiler

 

I am ashamed of my accent. It makes me sound dumb and I always mask it when I talk on Skype or elsewhere online. :l

 

What kind of accent do you have?

 

[video=youtube;uxvHGxRbn5U]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uxvHGxRbn5U[/video]

;_________;

 

Doesn't sound that bad at all o.o

 

The sad thing is that the 'A' and 'E' thing must be true because when I was in New York last year, my Mam and I were trying to check into our hotel and were asked to spell our surname.. needless to say the E somehow got changed to an A for the duration of our stay.


i'm a poet and didn't know it

 

Whhhhhhhhhhhhhy? D: You should be proud! And you don't sound dumb. >|

 

Ah, you're a Geordie? Just be thankful your not from Essex, ever since that reality TV show it's made them seem so dumb, and stupid and-

Spoiler

Ohh... I forgot Geordie Shore for a moment...

Nah, i'm kidding. The accent is fine, I like it more on the women then the men, and I like the diversity of accents on this little island. It's not dumb, unfortunately the most prominent speakers of the accent are advertised effectively as dumb, but I know a couple of Geordies with a good ol head on their shoulders. Also, Sarah Millican! <3

 

I forgot to pack my own lunch.