looking for some sort of second opinion I guess

Discussion in 'Help with Life' started by Aelin, Nov 17, 2013.

  1. Aelin Best Waifu

    Joined:
    Jun 30, 2011
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    British Columbia, Canada
    1,423
    Okay so I don't honestly know what sort of advice I am looking for but I just kinda need something. Currently I am going through a lot of crap between work and personal life that has left me numb emotionally. It all started two weeks ago when I arrived to work to see a fight between my chef/friend and the breakfast cook at my work. I arrive just intime to witness it. Later that night after work I get a text from my chef saying that they are letting the breakfast cook stay so he is leaving. I only came to the job to support my friend. I moved Towns, left home family and friends for this job. The place I work is only an hour from my home where my family and friends are, but that still isn't close enough to see them everyday. I have no friends it internet at my new place and now the only person I trust left my work. This scared me, I don't know what I can do. I can't leave my job or else I won't be able to afford rent, I don't want to move home because I enjoy being on my own and independent. And I get really nervous talking to new people making it extremely difficult to get a new job. As soon as they start firing questions at me I tend to freeze up. So this leaves me trapped at a job, at a restaurant that is failing, with people I get along with but don't really like. All I do with my day is work or sit around home. I am unable to call my friends because I lack internet and calling any of my friends is long distance since I moved towns. It leaves me in a really uncomfortable and bad place.

    On top of everything at work, my boyfriend and I have been drifting apart lately, so I finally broke it off the other day. I felt like any longer and our relationship would start to be based off fake emotions and that wasn't right. I wasn't sure if I should do it at first but with the help often friends I realized that I would only hurt him more by keeping it going and I didn't want that. After this I went from depressed about work to just not feeling anything. Not sorrow, not relief, just nothing and it doesn't seem right. One of my friends suggested a therapist but that ties back into troubles to people I don't know. It makes me nervous and frankly I can't like talk at all. I can't bring myself to talk to my parents, or find/make an appointment with one myself.

    So with all this I guess I just need advice on what to do and where to go. I know it is not right to sit here and feel nothing after I dated my boyfriend for 6 months and was my first relationship. I just don't know what to do or how to deal with it.
     
  2. Patman Bof

    Joined:
    Oct 19, 2010
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    France
    672
    You make it sound as if you have to quit a job to look for another. You don' t. Since you already have a job to fall back on going through the hoops and jumps of finding another shouldn' t be that stressfull : you don' t have anything to lose and can do it at any pace that suits you.

    Worst case scenario, if you notice the interview is going south, you can switch to full troll mode and get a few lulz out of it. When life gives you lemon ...
     
  3. Amaury Legendary Hero

    Joined:
    Jan 15, 2007
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    Location:
    Ellensburg, WA
    1,692
    I know it's hard, but you did the right thing with your relationship. It's better to end a relationship that's not going anywhere rather than continue it because both people could end up being severely emotionally hurt rather than just sad that the relationship has ended. Additionally, I don't think you not feeling anything means anything. It's probably just your way, without you even realizing it, of dealing with the sadness.

    As for work, definitely keep working there. Just because the one person you trusted left doesn't mean you should. Try to find ways to contact him out of work, such as meeting up with him at a park every now and then.

    While you may not feel like it, do talk to either a counselor or your parents. Your parents, especially, will be proud of you for being able to share this with them.

    In any case, I hope this helps, and I'm always available on Skype if you ever want to chat.