OOC: Re: Mario's High School Days II - Age of the New World Order

Discussion in 'OOC Lounge' started by Meilin Lee, May 28, 2018.

  1. Meilin Lee RPG (Red Panda Girl)

    Nov 2, 2011
    I really wish I didn’t have to write what I’m about to say, but here I am…

    While working on a new post, I've been trying to brainstorm and think of what to write. But as I stared at my screen, I just couldn't write anything. I was thinking that maybe it was a bad case of writer's block. As I thought more and more about it, I realized it was more than just a simple case of writer's block. I came to the conclusion that I have finally reached the point where I just couldn't continue RPing any longer.

    I think it's something I've been thinking for a while but didn’t want to admit, and sitting here and typing this feels like the final step to a journey I started way back in 2013.

    I love this RP. I've spent a bit more than a quarter of my life on it. It's hard to think how my life during the past eight years may have been different if I never took part in Mario’s High School Days. I've poured so much into the RP, constantly brainstorming plots while also getting ideas from shows, movies, and games I am into. It hasn't always been a healthy relationship though... I think I was too close to the RP, too involved. I let it consume me. I didn't think about or do anything else. Working on just one post at a time would take me days, sometimes more than a week to complete, because there were so many things to take into account. I had to think of what each character would say, how would they react, and whether their actions were logical based on their history and personality. And I would always have to circle back to past posts constantly to make sure nothing I was posting was conflicting with things that were established in the RP already. My commitment to the RP made having time for playing video games and watching shows/movies pretty scarce.

    But I wouldn't trade my experiences in HSD for the world, and I don't know what I would be without this RP. I joined as a very novice RPer, not sure what I was doing at first, just wanting to have fun having characters I like interacting with other characters I like or am not even familiar with. And I'm leaving, with a firm grasp on who I am and who I want to be.

    It's just time. Time for me to go. I just don't have the time for this RP anymore. I work full-time and have been mainly on my own ever since my co-worker retired months ago (and I just got a promotion yesterday, meaning even more responsibility for me). I’m in a serious relationship and am focusing on trying to get engaged to my girlfriend within several months. Point being, I just don't have time to commit to this RP anymore. But it may be also the fact that I'm growing up and have more important commitments in my life. And because of that, I am going to have to prioritize. I wish I could reserve time for this RP because I truly do love it, I love the stories I've brought to life in it, and I love seeing all the possible character interactions. But I have to face facts. These are things that just aren't feasible anymore. I feel I have to come out and say that there are just other things in my life now that take precedent, other things I want to pursue. And it's time to finally make this decision.

    Not going to lie, this was not an easy decision for me at all. I kept going back and forth whether this was the right decision or not. I wanted to see through the stories of all these amazing characters and give them all a proper ending. I had ideas for new characters I wanted to reserve and bring into HSD. I wanted to write some additional side stories that contribute to the HSD canon. I had already planned out the remaining stories for MHSD 2, and had ideas for a third (and final) RP that would finally conclude the overarching story that started since 2013. But I have to accept the fact that, given how things were moving along, getting to that point was going to take so many more years to reach, and just wasn't feasible. I do feel terrible that many questions I've left open across the story may never get answered. Perhaps one day I can write up an outline detailing my plans right towards the finishing point. Maybe one day in the future if I feel like it, I can continue writing the story to the end and post it online for whoever may want to read it.

    To those of you reading this, there's plenty I'd like to say, and maybe I'll get a chance to say something. But I just wanted to say thank you. Thank you for sticking with HSD all these years and continuing to participate, for exchanging ideas for plots, for putting up with me when I reach out and offer comments on certain posts. It's been a joy working with you all.

    If you want to reach out to me, it may be best to do it over a PM here on KHV. I'm not sure if I'll even be logging into Skype for a while.

    It's been amazing.