Role Play Idol [Season One] FINALE.

Discussion in 'RP Idol Archive' started by Jayn, Sep 25, 2011.

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  1. Jayn

    Sep 30, 2007


    Congratulations, Bushy and Chesterfield for making it to the final challenge. You have fought long and hard and managed to reach the very end. I would also like to take this time to thank everyone else who signed up for Season One. It was a very complicated idea and I was worried no one would be interested. It means a lot to me personally that you all gave it a chance.

    Another thank you to the judges for all of their hard work. Critiquing is not an easy task, especially when there were 12 people to write for the first time and so on. I appreciate how maturely you've all worked with each other despite differences, or levels of friendship, etc.

    Another thank you to Arch for the idea for this challenge, and a thank you to Chevalier for helping me out with the pin stuff, because making pins is hard. Now the only question that remains is who will be rewarded the very first role play idol pin?

    I would like to direct your attention to this thread. For any of the past contestants and judges, or anyone simply following the competition, please feel free to suggest things that you think would work better for future Role Play Idols. A few things will be changed for season two, but yeah.

    As always, some things on judging are addressed in the spoiler below.

    Your judges for Season One will now be the mysterious FuzzyBlueLights, the role play veteran Machina, and the tasty Ploo-Hems.

    For any of you concerned with biased or unfair judging, SOME of my rules and regulations for them specifically can be found in the spoiler tag. Any unfair treatment will result in the forced resignation of said judge, no exceptions. They've all agreed to the below.

    Being a judge in itself can sound pretty liberating. But it's really not all fun and games. I have quite a few things to let you guys know, but we'll keep it as simple as possible for now. Obviously, this group was made for a reason. To share information and discuss things together between ourselves. You four are the judges. Keep in mind this makes your opinions influence the other members, and also puts you in a position of responsibility.

    You are to be f a i r. When you judge others posts, it has nothing to do with who they are, or if you like them, their literacy, if you've seen them before, how often they role play, blah. I mean, when you really judge them, it's unbiased.

    You are to be h u m b l e. Being in any kind of position of power might boost your ego more so than it may already be boosted. Just make sure you realize we're all just members here. Respect each other. It is important not to discourage anyone, or make them feel like they're unimportant, unworthy, or anything negative. Please use caution and think before you hit 'submit'.

    You are to be l a w f u l. The next thing I'll cover are some basic guidelines. Rather, areas you'll actually be judging. [...CONT'D ELSEWHERE]

    The Challenge

    So what exactly does looking in the mirror mean? As Arch put it as he suggested this challenge; sometimes in role plays you have more than one character, and it's inevitable that they'll sometime have to interact with one another. In other words, instances in which you have to role play with yourself.

    There are a few things that come with this. Most people can do it well, but how well?

    Keep in mind all of the critiques that you have been given so far throughout this entire challenge, but be true to yourself as well. Also, remember that you will be using both of your characters in this challenge. You will not be interacting with each other, but with yourself. Don't forget distinctions, not only aesthetically but in character. Be true to your character's personalities.

    Because this is the very last challenge, I give you free reign with your scenario. This gives you unlimited creativity. You have one post each, using both of your characters in whatever way you'd like.

    If you need further clarification, please message me.

    You will be receiving your critiques before the winner is decided, and there is--of course, no voting this time around.

    Rules or restrictions for this Challenge.

    ♣ You may interact with yourself only, and you MUST interact with yourself. (Both of your characters interacting with each other.)

    ♣ There is no restriction on powers or weapons. You guys know better.

    ♣ Remember that this is a competition. Try your best to impress me, and the judges. If you're not trying, it will be evident.

    ♣ Posts count, so be relevant. Please don't spam questions in this thread about this challenge, contact me personally.

    ♣ You have until SEPTEMBER 28th, 2011 to post. Preferably before then, because season two sign ups start soon.

    ♣ Be creative and have fun! It is a competition, but it's also about being creative, original and letting loose.

    ♣ Graphics are okay to use if you want them. But I'm not making them for anyone in this competition. And if you use them, you're not scoring any extra points with the judges. I've made it clear that graphics does not equal superior.

    ♣ Post your posts in this thread, below my post.

    ♣ Once you submit, that's your post. You can edit spelling errors and such, but please don't add more on. Only because it would be unfair to post, compare to everyone elses post and edit more in based off of what other people post. Please leave a reason if you do edit your post.

    ♣ You may use BOTH of your characters.

    Members who have yet to post...

    Bushy Brow - Izzy Kumo [m] + Ilia Kumo [f]

    theonly9one - Heather [f] + Brad [m]

    Good luck to the both of you! :]
  2. MadDoctorMaddie I'm a doctor, not a custom title!

    Apr 19, 2008
    Med Bay
    OOC: Well, here goes! I've had so much fun with this competition, and I'm ecstatic that I actually made it to the finals.

    If nothing else, I'm rather proud of this post myself.
    To the point that I'm seriously considering using it in a story >.>


    Heather most certainly didn’t need to be the center of attention at all times, but was it really too much to ask that her inactive sparring partner held the cushions at an angle where she could actually land a hit or kick on them? She’d tried to get Brad to focus by punching a bit harder than needed, but Brad only grimaced more, and didn’t even bother adjusting his position. Finally, completely fed up she hooked her calf behind his kneecap and gave him a hard shove, sending him sprawling onto the unforgiving floor much to his surprise.

    “Dude, what the hell? You’ve barely looked at me the entire day, not to mention the fact that you’ve been an even lousier sparring partner than Greg at his worst,†Heather commented, somewhat hurt. Brad looked up at her before pinching his brow for a few moments, and giving her a halfhearted grin.

    “Well, you know I’m a lover, not a fighter,†Brad didn’t even attempt to avoid Heather’s punch as he got up, in stead continuing to talk, “I’m having a bit of a migraine attack again, that’s all.â€

    Heather immediately knew he was lying (okay, he definitely was having a migraine attack, but that wasn’t the point), and she started regretting her actions. Her hand went to gently touch his arm, and she guided Brad to the bench, tossing him a bottle of water and taking a big swig out of hers, the usual calming effects nowhere to be felt.

    “Your dreams have started again, haven’t they?â€

    Brad sighed, and glancing down he nodded, “It’s starting to get to the point where I can’t tell if it’s an actual prophetic dream, or some bats*** nightmare. Just last night I had a dream where some demons were taking over the world, and we were in the middle of it all… And that’s probably been the most realistic dream I’ve had since the one about Kate dying.â€

    Heather’s mood was further dampened. Brad was closer to her than her own brother and boyfriend, and whenever his dreams surfaced, she felt completely powerless. Being reminded of Greg’s sister’s death didn’t exactly help, either. Brad seemed to sense this.

    "Hey, just forget about it, it's not like you caused this... What about you, you seem a little on edge yourself.â€

    Heather grimaced, before jumping to her feet and starting to pace, “It’s just the promotion the school gave me, I mean, being the head student guard is a super big honor, but I’m starting to feel the pressure, and I don’t like it.†She swiped a strand of hair behind her ear nervously as she went on, “It’s like there’s something big brewing, and I don’t think I’m ready for it. Keeping arrogant, spoiled, drunk jacka**es from assaulting every girl in sight is difficult enough, and if something bigger is gonna show up I’m scared that I’m gonna fail. Miserably. Ugh, I’m babbling again, aren’t I?â€

    With a frustrated growl, she sank into a crouch, burying her head beneath her arms. She felt Brad shifting to be next to her, and he softly wrapped his arms around her.

    “Hey, if anybody’s gonna have a reason to babble, it’s you. You’re right, the administration is placing a lot of pressure on you, but they wouldn’t be doing it if there were anyone else they thought could do it better. If there’s anyone who kick’s a**-“

    Brad was interrupted by a mixture of screams of terror and animal-like yelps that sent shivers down their spines. Heather jumped to her feet, running to the door of the gym at full speed.


    “My gun, will do. I’ve got another bottle of water, so don't worry about that."

    Seeing that Brad was right behind her, gun aimed at the floor but ready to snap into action in a matter of seconds, she opened the door, dashing out at a brisk jog, her friend fast on her heels. Nothing out of the ordinary greeted them, apart from the piercing sound of the alarm system. They made their way down two flights before being attacked. Viciously.

    Heather was thrown down a flight of stairs, her attacker leaping to grab her from behind into a choke hold. Brad shot an entire round of bullets into it, but somehow that didn’t seem to affect it at all. She desperately grasped towards Brad, hoping he’d catch her cue. Fortunately he did, as he had been training for years to read his partners, and he tossed the bottle at her, giving it a squeeze to let some water loose. With a crook of her finger, she willed the liquid to solidify itself into an unbreakable chain, and wrapped it around her assaulter’s throat. She elbowed it in the stomach, forcing its grip of her to break before twisting around to deal a powerful kick to its head. The attacker fell to the ground, and Heather tightened her mental grip on the watery chain, and with one last croak, their enemy fell limp, giving Heather and Brad their first look at the attaer.

    “Oh my God, your dream!†Heather gasped. Brad felt his jaw grow slack, before saying, “Either that’s the most disfigured human ever, or we’re being attacked by the spawns of hell.â€
  3. Bushy "Don't think. Imagine!"

    May 27, 2008
    On the other side of the internet.
    OOC: This contest has been a blast.
    Whatever happens now happens. Later folks.


    The two just sat there... back to back. A camp fire crackling with a burning passion next to them. It was early evening, so the sky was just starting to turn dark now.
    Inaudible low moans could be heard around the city as the twins sat on the cold hard floor of their makeshift camp.

    "There's not much longer left now." Ilya murmured uncomfortably, her quiet voice finally tearing through the silent moans of the city and shattering the illusion around them.
    "...Yeah." Izzy muttered, answering his sister back. "Not much longer now. Until the next time."
    "If there is one." she cut him off quickly, almost unable to put belief in her own revelation.
    "True enough..." he sighed and then gave a small chuckle. "To think we've experienced so much. So many different scenarios. It's like the creator in this game is playing some cruel sick joke on us, and now more so with them leaving us in this last scenario of all things."
    "But at the same time... we got to live. Even if briefly and in different ways." she giggled in her own way.
    "It was fun. We had many great lives, well... some of them, as well as the few bad."
    "You actually got to take down a Dragon." Ilya smiled as she recalled the memory where her brother had to overcome several trials in order to save her.
    "And we both went to an Academy where we trained to take down demons. Oh, how I would have loved my powers against that dragon. Shame that our different lives were all separate then."
    "...You ended up fighting a lot for me didn't you? In each of those lives... you even... lost yourself when..." her words started to become hidden behind soft sobs.
    Izzy sighed and finally removed his back from his sister's, twisting around and placing two arms around her fragile form, pulling her into a hug.
    "...Don't worry about it, you're my sister, of course I'd fight for you."
    "But what about that last world?! ...You suffered so much!"
    "In the end... you and I were reunited, and the other two were fine too." he shivered at the thought of his darkest life. "At least, here. I've been able to learn from my mistakes and the madness I experienced from that past life."

    They stayed like that for a few more moments, the silence overtaking them again. Ilya tenderly raised a hand, and let it lay atop her brother's whose arms were still around her. "I learnt a lot too. I've grown so much as a person even though we always ended up starting over again each time."
    "Hmm?" Izzy made his noise of enquiry.
    "...I experienced many different worlds. I even got to experience love, and so many other different but wonderful things. But, throughout it all. You were always there, always the one constant thing. You always fought for me and helped me when I felt I couldn't manage it. Whenever I felt weak. You were always there." she explained, finally turning in his arms to face him and lay her head against his shoulder.
    "Well, we are twins. We were together in creation, so it figures we'd always be together." he chuckled. Recalling not only the times he had fought, but even the simple moment where he had set up a 'date' for his sister and that one friend. He had been such a matchmaker there in that normal life."I'm not going to leave you. Not even at the very end. Even if that may be now."

    Time seemed to actually stand still, which would have been bliss if that were true. The end wouldn't have to come. They could just stay here, lost in the memories of their other lives and the life they had lived here until now. They could remember and relive the feelings of love beating in their hearts, the thrill of reliving the Demon classes they had, the wonderment at having gotten to grow up together, again and again and again. Things that would have only usually happened in dreams and nightmares. It didn't matter whether they were good or bad memories. Did they have any favourites? Not really. Each one was special in their own way. They had been blessed to be together every single time and that was what made everything okay. It is what made now okay.

    "I have to say... I'm a little glad, you know?"
    "Yeah. I know." he smirked while ruffling her hair, despite the inevitable odds that they would soon be facing.
    She clung tightly to his shirt as he continued to hold her in his brotherly embrace. "All of our lives... they came together now. Everything, all of our experiences. If this is how it ends, then I'm glad I get to have everything for this final time."
    "Hey, you never know. This may not be the end." he smiled, to be greeted by her smiling back at him. They could both read each others minds almost as they said the next thing, their 'twin telepathy' that they had always joked about kicking in. "And even if it is. We're together, and we shall go that way."
    A loud sound suddenly erupted from closeby, shattering the mood. The two stood up at last... nodding at each other and looking from their high up position. The burning glow of red from the camp fire revealed their last twist of fate. Thousands of lifeless beings around them in every direction, with no chance for them to escape.

    The many different lives they had experienced, would come to an end with this act. However there was also a blessing with how things turned out this time. They had kept more than just their experiences of their past lives.
    Izzy's bright blue eyes flashed and then burned a furious white as black flames surrounded him, licking the air furiously and consuming his body.
    Ilya's warm red eyes flashed and then sparked a shocking yellow as black sparks of electricity surged around her and crackled in the air in a rage, consuming her body.
    The two looked at each other one last time, giving off one final reassuring smile each, before looking forward at the gigantic horde against them.
    They took off running without regrets.

  4. Jayn

    Sep 30, 2007
    You both did absolutely awesomely. Congratulations to the both of you for making it this far. The judges have been talking about it and reading your posts...

    Over the challenges, you all have received the following critiques;

    Something to be worked on I think is the presentation. The colors were readable (default forum skin user), and there were a lot of ellipses. "..." is a pause, remember. So when you read your post it was almost more of a poem than a 'story', to me. It was still lovely, though. Very creative.

    There were a few cases were the ellipses became too repetitive. It detracted from the confused sensation that you were creating at times by extending the pauses out too much.

    Insults aside, the spacing you have is a little awkward. It looks almost as if you push the Enter key a little too often.

    Ellipses were still used a bit in over-abundance but you definitely show growth, which is very important. Now, content-wise...Your posts are always very real.

    Alright, so like Jayn had mentioned, there was still a bit of overuse of ellipses. I think that you could have cut them out at some parts, which to me seemed like they would have had a better effect without the pause.

    Nice post...just try not to squeeze out extra awesome when it doesn't need to be there.

    Also, what tends to get me about your posts is though they are creative and fun, the format is a little odd. The paragraphs are broken up so that looking at it makes me feel like I'm looking at a poem, and not an RP post. As for ellipses, you've definitely cut down, but there are still quite a few unnecessary pauses.

    All of your posts so far have been pretty witty and creative. xD And while there was one or two unnecessary pauses, I thought you did a really good job with the ellipses.

    Your formatting has improved, though towards the end it started to look like a poem again. imo. xD It's obvious you're paying attention to the critiques. I tried to explain what I meant by spacing things out a bit in the quote above.

    You did very well with the detail. I like how you gave insight on the character's usually behaviors and person as well. Howeverrrrr, the person (or style) you wrote in in the beginning threw me off. I felt myself confused more often than I wanted to be, which is probably my own problem. The 'she thinks' part was a bit repetitive, to me in the beginning so I'm glad it didn't continue. As the piece went on and continued, it got better and better. You did extremely well.

    First off, the last thoughts of your character were hard to read. Don't use the default purple ever! EVAR. Your choice of narrative was a little awkward and that's really my main complaint. It just...didn't feel as good as it could've been. It just takes away from the feeling of the post. Technically speaking it was well written and everything but the narrative of it just makes everything worded awkwardly. I like what you did but my suggestion is to go with traditional Third Person.

    I was thrown off a bit by the style in which you chose to write it. It's definitely unique.

    Alright. Um. I feel like this was just a bit rushed.

    While technically speaking there's nothing wrong with your post...It is underwhelming considering it's you who's writing this. Even with a short post your character is great but I guess I just expected more. Though in light of the circumstances, I'm willing to give you the benefit of the doubt.

    Amazing, as usual. Your posts weren't actually overwhelmingly long. xD You found a nice balance, as I saw in the last challenge your post was surprisingly short, and in this they were consistently pleasant. Good luck in the finale.

    This must be so agonizing for you guys.

    No, but seriously the winner is... /troll

    Chesterfield! *Balloons and crap*

    You were amazing through and through. Great job to you. You also get the first RP Idol pin EVER...When (insert name here) finishes it for me. :'D Congratulations, you are the Role Play Idol.

    And congratulations to Bushy for making it this far. Good luck to you in the future. :]
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