Tips To Pull Yourself Out Of A Depression

Discussion in 'Help with Life' started by Fearless, Oct 16, 2016.

  1. Fearless A good and beautiful child

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    I need some.

    But in all seriousness, my depression has been an on again/off again problem for the past ten years. I've had therapy in the past (though I'm not at the moment), and I've been on meds for the better part of two years (though I'm thinking of getting them changed).

    I'm definitely a hell of a lot better than I used to be, but sometimes I get into a funk where I can't do anything. Right at the moment, I've got a sink full of dishes, a planner full of homework, and a to-do list a mile long, and I can't be arsed to do any of it, despite the voice that's screaming at me in my head saying GET UP AND DO SOMETHING ASDFGHJKL;LKHGFDSA.

    The purpose of this thread is twofold;

    1) I need some help. I'm hoping to go to a doctor over winter break and get looked at/get my prescription changed/whatever, but that's still a good two months away, and I can't wait that long. What I need is tips to help me pull myself up long enough to get through the semester, anything you can think of, even if it's just a quick fix. I wouldn't be posting this if I wasn't at least a little bit desperate.

    2) I want to help others. I want this to be a thread people can look at to help them if they ever feel the way I do right now.

    Anything you can offer is good by me.

    Thanks~ <3
     
  2. Day~Dream Kingdom Keeper

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    I know what you mean, having so much to do and having no energy/motivation to do it.

    Personally, when I'm like that I listen to uplifting music to help get me going. Music therapy in a way. It's my go to whenever I'm down and feeling that. I have a playlist for everything. Break up's, for motivation, when I'm just down, etc. Listening to a playlist that matches my mood makes me feel like I'm not alone with however I'm feeling. If you're interested in making one and need some assistance (with making a playlist or if you just need someone to talk to) I am here. : )
     
  3. Sara Tea Drinker

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    This is a personal story I ask not to be spread around...

    I spiraled into depression my last year in college, and yes... My last year as admin here. I had a lot of bad things going on in the family, at the forum and a lot of other things I won't divulge in. I barely did my homework, studied or even leave my room for classes. A few weeks before the end of college, I found out I was failing and tried to kill myself, right before I did it, something took over me and I called my mom at 2 am in the morning and confessed everything. Including the fact at how badly I was failing. She surprisingly wasn't angry despite all the money I owed at the point and helped me through the last two weeks, including begging the teachers with help from the local disability center for an extension until September, which they reluctantly gave.

    I can't say I miraculously got cured overnight, that the phone call saved everything from going down that summer when I struggled with it. I had a great and kind employer at the time who really helped me along the support of my family and friends. The biggest change was Aiden, my little fluffball of a cat I got as a kitten that fall. He is something that I wake up for in the morning and cling to no matter how bad it gets and he returns with unflinching love and silent support no matter what happens. I still get depression once in a while, for a while nearly as bad as I had it before, but it's slowly been getting better.

    The best I can say is: You have family and friends out there that care about you, even if you don't know it. Even if they're just online. Maybe even a pet that you adore that no matter how bad it gets: They're always with you.
     
  4. Shuhbooty moon child

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    This is a very rough subject because I've changed my ways dozens of times over the many years I have suffered with depression. However I hope some of these can help you.

    First off, I keep a journal. And I write down everything I can. Now I don't bring it with me everywhere because I'm terrified of losing it. So in my notes i write a small detail that will remind me to talk about it. A day can be busy and hectic and the sad part about it, with me is that I can forget that small thing even tho it was super important to me. But this is important. Writing helps you reflect on what you did. And this is what I write.
    • How my day went.
    • What bothered me through out my day.
    • What sparked anxiety or ANY emotion.
    • How did I really feel about my day.
    • What was super cool or important though out my day.
    • What made me happy.
    I try and be as detailed as I can, and when I'm not I can look back and see "oh well, I was having a bad day". I also like to write about the things that inspired me. That means a lot. In terms of lists tho, I never go all out anymore. I get too overwhelmed and feel cluttered and it just makes me feel terrible. Because I never really finish everything on there. So when I do make lists they are super tiny. I got laundry to fold? Alright, on the list. I need to vacuum? Ok on the list. I never put more then 4 things on there. And school is an everyday thing, so If i have a ton of school work to do, I'll make a list based on when it's due. For example:

    Here I leave "study" off. Because I also study, even when I'm doing homework. I mean.. it's homework. Idk I lump it together. So lets say today is Monday. I will make a list for that day.

    • "Make an outline for power point project." (insert due date)
    • "Make an outline for essay due" (then insert the date)

    I stick these in my planner because that's what i view all day. So here, I just focus on the important stuff. I don't add anything else because I know I will feel overwhelmed AND when I want to take a break I clean. So I don't write down the chores that need to be done. (if you do something else when you take a break from homework focus on that. If it's tv time, social media time do that. Don't stray into something you know will make you unhappy or any sort of anxiety.)

    Secondly, I focus more on what makes me sad then happy. Sometimes there are reasons and sometimes there aren't but it's better to find out what makes you unhappy then to not, ya know? This is what I've learned over the last few months and I've never felt better. If i know sitting on the comp playin games makes me unproductive and unhappy? I don't do it. This is super important, but this works for me. If you need to focus on what makes you happy then do that.

    Thirdly, find out what makes you happy. I finally went out and did the things I've always wanted to try and do, and I love them. I've been able to make new friends. but remember if something makes you uncomfortable or if you have some kinda social anxiety don't engage in it. :/ Unless you really wanna try it out, then I defiantly encourage you. I also like to try new things and interact with people that I know I can be friends with. School is different, since I'm not in clubs or taking many classes. So I can't give too much there, but with work I engage my co-workers and then in my creative writing club I volunteer to go first I give my opinions and what I want to change with their writing that they bring in!
     
  5. Maka Albarn It's called love

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    I have been meaning to reply to this ever since you linked us in the discord chat.

    I've been struggling with depression since I was about 13 years old (or at least acknowledged it), and really didn't get medicated for it until I was 20 after I was finally hospitalized. Medicine does help tremendously, but it can only do so much.

    How I survived was journaling as skittles said. Until about 16 years old I kinda stopped. But it does help if you keep at it.

    When I went to support/therapy groups (cause I was struggling with other things with the depression like anxiety, PTSD, insomnia, and other things), they taught me how to self-regulate and stay positive, even on the go.

    So one of the things they had us make these mental health "kits", and you can put stuff in it to help you. Like for me, this is what I put in mine;

    • Bouncy balls
    • Good music
    • Coloring sheets
    • Box of crayons
    • Pens/pencils
    • Journal/Notepad
    • Good headphones
    • Extra phone charger
    • Playdough
    • Bubbles
    • Couple of pieces of chocolate
    • Good smelling lotion
    • Bubble bath formula
    • My favorite book/manga
    • Tissues
    • A favorite blanket to wrap myself in
    • Hot chocolate & marshmallow packets
    • Tea bags
    • Favorite mug
    Seems really silly and simple, but if I found myself going into a depressive sweep, I ended up going to the box and pulling something out to distract me a bit. Now my kit is whatever I have on hand and no longer in a box, but the box is a good place to start.

    Also what helps me is to cry. To me, before treatments, I hated to cry. It just showed how much more weaker I was and I was so mad at myself if tears started to come. But I learned just to accept it and ride it out. It sucks, you get so tired afterwards, but it helps release the pain you bottle up through the day. Find a quiet, secluded place, have a box of tissues handy, your favorite blanket, and just let yourself cry it out.

    I also make myself do activities that make me focus and be mindful of myself. Cause the last thing you wanna do when you're depressed is focus on you. So I do activities that stimulate my mind, but not in a way to overwhelm myself and help me refocus my attention on my responsibilities and my wellbeing. Activities like:

    • Puzzles
    • Coloring
    • Drawing/sketching
    • Singing
    • Yoga
    • Learning a new easy recipe to cook
    • Taking a walk
    • Taking care of my pets/plants
    • Reading a book
    • Walking
    • Taking a relaxing bubble bath/shower
    Sometimes when you're depressed, you have to force yourself to do things you don't want to do or feel like you can do. But I make it fun by making a sticky note to-do list of that day. I limit myself to five things, cause otherwise I'll get overwhelmed and feel like I can't accomplish anything. But I put one task on one sticky note, and put it on a wall. When the task is done, I rip it off the wall, wad it into a ball, and throw it away. It's the most satisfying feeling in the world. And things get done!

    Above all, and I'm still getting a handle on this, but be patient with yourself. Take baby-steps if you need to, it's okay to cry, and take it slow. Everyone deals with this a little bit differently. It can come in waves, and it might be present all the time. But this doesn't make you a flawed person, or even a bad friend. People will still love you and need you no matter what.

    I mean, being personal here, therapists and people in the past told me I wasn't going to be able to work with kids cause of my depression, I was going to be a dysfunctional human being of society, but I had no reason to feel the way I did. But now I have a full time job working with kids and their families, I moved out on my own, paying my own bills, managing my own chores, bought my own car, and I'm about to get my associates in child development. And guess what? I still have depression and other problems. But I proved them wrong and doing stuff they say I couldn't have done.

    When you're down, focus on your accomplishments. If I remember correctly, you moved out on your own recently, yes? That's a huge step! Find people who are supportive of you, who will give a listening ear no matter what, and give you the positive validation you deserve cause you're an awesome person. It took me forever, but I found people who really care about me and don't care I keep falling into depression over and over again. They just wait patiently and give me a listening ear, tell me that I am a cool person and I do really matter. And know this; it's okay to be sad for a while. But it's also okay to be happy too.

    You got this. I hoped I helped a bit.
     
  6. Cat~ Transformation

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    Bumping because I've had some low lows over the past seven months and even though my personal coping mechanisms probably aren't healthy or good, they might help someone. Who knows?

    My funks tend to hit out of nowhere and last anywhere from a couple of days to a week or two. I tend not to have the best habits anyway, but the biggest things that seem to contribute to the depressive mood for me are a lack of schedule in my daily life and incessant worrying about my future. Given those things, some tips I have for avoiding the funk and/or helping to climb out of it are the following:

    • DO NOT F**K UP YOUR SLEEP SCHEDULE. Keep hours that are reasonable, and don't end up lying around at 2pm wondering what you've done to yourself. Plus, once you're out of the funk you're probably going to have to go back to regular activities, and a messed up schedule will prevent that.
    • TRY TO GO OUT AND PLAN THINGS WITH FRIENDS. This one isn't always possible, but during the summer I was going through some really bad times and a friend of mine would constantly have me go over to his place to chill and watch some shows or play some games. It did a lot to keep my spirits up.
    • INDULGE YOURSELF AT LEAST A LITTLE. When I hit a funk, I get L-A-Z-Y and I tend to just sit around doing nothing. It's the worst thing you can do. But, it doesn't hurt to let yourself watch a show you love or play a game you've wanted to come back to. Again, it's something to lift spirits.
    • TALK TO SOMEONE. Even if it's not about your current dilemma, start up an IM chat with someone. Hell, even just posting in the Discord group is helping me deal with the current funk as I type this. I do talk to a friend specifically about this when things get bad, but just starting with a generic conversation can be a huge help.
    • REMEMBER TO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF. Personal care falls to the wayside when I'm in a funk (hell, it's usually the first indicator that I'm in it), and that's not good. At all. Try to take care of yourself, if nothing else.
    • FIND MOTIVATION. No matter how low the low, you need something to pull you out. Whether that's friends & family, or the fact that KH3 is out in a year, find something that you know can motivate you to keep going.
    • TRY TO AVOID THINGS THAT YOU KNOW WILL HELP YOU SPIRAL. This should be obvious, but I know this is advice that I find hard to follow a lot of the time. When I sink, I tend to lean on sad songs (I have certain designated "depression songs") and sad fanfic. Try to avoid a lot of that. Yes, it's good to know that other people know how you feel, and yes it might help on a surface level, but in my case I know it tends to keep me in the funk longer than it should when I rely on too much of it.
    I know this thread is meant more for how to cope with it, but I figured I could dump some stuff to help while people are in the middle of it.
     
  7. Zgermanguy Destiny Islands Resident

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    sport or anything that can distract you from the bad thoughts. But if it is getting to bad than go and see someone again.
     
  8. Laurence_Fox Chaser

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    Having gone through a few of this and anticipate going through more in the future...

    1. Find something to look forward to. Wether it be that new video game coming out or there's a movie coming out you want to see. Heck, even if it's just because Christmas is coming up and you love seeing the twinkling lights. Or getting another paycheck at work.
    2. Wear your favorite item of clothing. Even if it's the socks with the frogs on them.
    3. Remember to eat and stay hydrated. Trust me, dehydration sucks. You do not want to go through that.
    4. Keep on top of your hygiene. Yeah. I know it may seem hard to get in the shower but even something as simple as brushing your teeth or washing your face can make you feel better. Even if that's the most you do in a day. You can feel like you accomplished something by washing your hair.
    4a. Don't feel like taking a shower? Soak in a warm bath with bubbles. Use that fancy bath bomb you've been saving. Or use some dry shampoo. Get some nice smelling lotion. Winter's coming up guys. Dry skin galore.​
    5. Treat yourself. Have a bowl of ice cream or buy a new shirt. Make your favorite meal ( or ask your cooking parent to do so for you. )
    6. Watch videos of baby animals.
    6a. Listen to nature sounds. Bird song, whale song, rain. Around this time of year when it's cool enough, I like to sit with the door open and listen to the leaves rattling down the road.​
    7. Listen to uplifting music. You're going to be tempted to listen to depressing music because that's the mood you're in but it's not going to help. I personally listen to '80s music because a lot of it tends to be upbeat and peppy. Dance music also helps.
    8. If you can, sit outside for a bit and enjoy nature. Walk around your block or your college campus. You get fresh air, sunshine, and some exercise. Winner winner chicken dinner.
    9. Find a Wiki and keep clicking ' random page '.
    10. Can't play a videogame for whatever reason? Watch a Let's Play of it. Sometimes you get the added benefit of quality commentary. I'm watching this LP of Minecraft right now and it's one of the best things ever.
    11. Find a communication outlet. Friends, family, your favorite teacher at school, a co-worker, someone you can talk to. ( Because let me tell you, isolation is one of the worst things you can go through. )
    12. Keep up your sleep. You need sleep to function. You need sleep to heal. Just like from a physical injury or an illness. This is no different.
    13. It may seem a bit hollow sounding, but things will get better.
    14. Clean. Even if it's just one small portion of your bedroom or you clean out your purse/backpack. It's best to do this on a day where you can open the windows. Again fresh air.
    15. The best thing is when the gloomy thoughts start creeping in is to occupy your mind elsewhere. Try doing a crossword puzzle or a word search. Play a board game with a friend or relative.