I can't hold things up so much like I used to. The years continue to go by, and things just get harder and harder. I am the most sensitive guy you will probably ever meet in your lifetime. I care about people more than anything. When they have stress, I have stress for them. It's almost as though I take it away from them and put it on myself. I WON'T kill myself, but at times i just sit there and...........unlike other guys......cry. Im really emotional and I can't keep holding up other peoples lives. I know this is the wrong choice, but it feels as if god put too large of a role for me. Please tell me what to do now! PLEASE!
I"m going on the assumption that you are a Christian. A simple answer is prayer. I'm going through the same troubles you are going through; I'm a sensitive guy who puts others before himself and I probably have too much on my plate to deal with right now but I feel God is calling me to help people. At times, I also do cry for the people around me because they are suffering so much. My own suffering is piled onto that and I just don't know what to do. You seem like a Christian person, so a good answer would be prayer because Jesus said that you will recieve whatever you ask for (Matthew 7). Also in Matthew 5, Jesus talks about the blessings of followers. "Blessed are the pure of heart for they will see God. Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God." (v.8-9). I can tell you are doing Gods work but being a Christian doesn't fully ensure that you will have a perfect life. You will still struggle and your faith may be tested, but rejoice in it afterwards and be thankful because it more than likely helped you in becoming a better person. Take everything and everyday one at a time. Our lives on this earth our short and we should make the most of it, but you need to tell God exactly what you need help with. I don't know you, but a lot of people pray for courage, peace, and strenght (and this includes me). Read through the Bible too, because that only grows your faith. Have you heard the story of the fig tree, when Jesus commands a fig tree to die and wither on the spot and it did. He then said "I tell you the truth. If you have faith and do not doubt, not only can you do what was done to the fig tree, but also you can say to the mountain 'Go, throw yourself into the sea' and it will be done. If you believe, you will recieve whatever you ask for in prayer" (Matthew 21:21-22, NIV). If you believe, you can move your mountians (representing struggles) out of your path and as far away as possible.
Loving people suffer, because they care about those around them. If you stop caring, you'll only have your own troubles to deal with, and not theirs. Alternatively, you can vent to someone else, and share your troubles with them. Perhaps a priest, or a friend. It's not your responsibility to ensure other people have a happy life. You need to place yourself first, because that's what everyone else does. By all means, help other people, but make sure you're able to help them. Otherwise it's the blind leading the blind.
Suffering is the price of love. Because you care, you suffer. It's just how this rotten world is. Although P words it in such a way that it sounds incredibly selfish and wrong, there does come a point where you have to put yourself first, and it seems to me that for you that time is now. Once you have fixed things for yourself, teach people to live vicariously through you by being happy, cheerful, and kind to yourself and others i equal parts. It seems as though people have learned to dump everything on you so they won't have to be sad for themselves. Show them that they no longer have a pound for their stray and unwanted emotions. The message of Klonoa 2: Lunatea's Veil is similar to this. To put it simply, in the game there were once five kingdoms, each pertaining to the Elements of Tranquility, Joy, Discord, Indecision, and Sorrow. However, the people of Lunatea had come to reject feelings of sorrow. As a result, the Kingdom of Sorrow became a desolate land inhabited by none except its King. In the end, Klonoa saved the King and his Kingdom, bringing back Sorrow to the world and making it a better place for it. You've become the King of Sorrow, and you need to let people know that you can't be their receptacle for loose emotions.
You're too kind. The sooner Sync realises he's the centre of his world, the happier he'll be. He can still be a Good Person, but he should put his needs above those of others.
Thank you all for your words of advice. I suppose I do need to care for myself more often than I do for others. It's hard, because my motto used to be "Put others before yourself", but I suppose I will need to work on myself more often. Thanks.
